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Friday, March 22, 2013

If sadness never reared it's ugly head, we wouldn't appreciate the beauty of happiness


(Thanks Helena)






I haven’t written a blog in a long while, and decided to start writing more, so here goes.

Today I am going to write about negative trials and tribulations in our lives.

Why do bad things happen to us? Why are we forced to endure the suffering of the daily grind, or heart wrenching tragedy in our lives? Why is it important for us to face these shitty situations?

I have very little to complain about, and let’s face it most of you reading this blog are on the same boat as I am.

I have a great life, with endless support of family and friends. I wake up every morning (thus far) and am thankful for everything I have in this life. But still, as human beings, we wonder why we have to suffer, or endure sadness, depression, pain, etc. etc.

It’s quite simple, If we didn't know what it felt like to be sad, we would never truly appreciate feeling happy.

Think about it, all of our obstacles push us towards something. We are who we are today because of hiccups, and failures that we’ve faced to get here.

Everything that has happened to us, good and bad, had to happen exactly the way it did, for us to be here today.

If we hadn’t fallen off our bikes as kids as we flirted with the idea of no training wheels, than we would never know the immense feeling of accomplishment when we finally venture off down the street without falling.

Personally, I have witnessed this in my life very recently.

I work in a very challenging field. As a behavioral therapist for children with Autism, ADHD, Asperger’s, Down Syndrome etcetera, I find myself seeing the most rewarding amazing looks in family’s eyes when their child accomplishes something I take for granted.

Recently, the company I worked for, in an act of stupidity, and jealousy, decided to fire me.

To say I was devastated is an understatement. In this field, we wear our hearts on our sleeves. I was very much attached to every single one of my clients, and emotionally invested in their program and success.

To be ripped out of their lives in the manner in which my “Situation” was handled left me empty, extremely sad, and highly disappointed.

It hurt to know these children would not be given an explanation as to why their friend, Mr. Nelson, would no longer be seeing them on a daily basis.

Writing this now, still leaves a bitter taste in my mouth, but I found my closure and reason why things like this happen.

As I wrote every parent a goodbye email thanking them for allowing me into their homes, and access to their children, I began to question why these things happen to good people. (I like to consider myself a good person, call me biased)

The replies I received from every single parent, lifted me up higher than I could imagine.

A resounding WTF was the common conclusion. Well they called in to my employer demanding an explanation.

But also included in the email replies, that they wanted me to continue seeing their children, that the job I was doing was above their every expectation, and that they would be willing to pay me whatever my private rate was to continue my therapy.

A few days later I received a call from my ex-employer telling me to, “Pretend this never happened, and return to my old schedule.”

As I politely declined the offer, everything came into focus. I was not meant to stay with this company. This company did not have their clients best interest at heart. They allowed their egos, and their jealousy, and their incompetence to slither to the front lines.

As I applied to other companies in the same field, and interviewed with them, I became determined to find a company I could trust, a company that had the children’s best interest at heart.

Luckily, I found just the place. I am in the process of accepting their offer as we speak.

The point here is not that I got another job, and that my former employer was stupid for letting me go.

The point is, that we must fail sometimes, to truly appreciate and understand our success.

For me, being fired, and finding another “home” in my career served as an eye opening experience.

We must never become comfortable, or complacent in our lives. Be it in terms of our careers, our relationships, or our friendships.

We must continue to be active participants in the dance we call life.

So my new outlook on life is rather simple.
Bring on the sadness, and the failures, and whatever other stormy forecasts, because I know that when, not if, I get through them, not only will I be stronger, but I will also have just that much more understanding of why things happen the way they do.

Life is unpredictable, when we try to plan out every single aspect, we usually end up falling. But if we stop and appreciate our lives. If we embrace the good the bad and the ugly, then falling wont be so bad, because the best part of life isn’t sitting atop the mountain enjoying the view, it’s the struggle and fight to get up there.


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